From One Thing To The Next
In the morning, Lord, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait expectantly. (Psalm 5:3, NIV)
Transitions are hard and I have been experiencing one after another lately. Several have felt impossible, while others are about holding both the letting go (loss) and the anticipation of new possibilities.
The Hebrew word for wait actually implies that it is active: to look out or about, keep watch, observe.My most recent transition is selling my condo in Florida, the location where I spent my winters practicing and playing golf during my career. It was my first home—a condo on the beach—and holds 19 years of memories with family, friends, golf, tears, laughter, respite, remodels, hurricane damage, and beautiful sunrises. It was the perfect place for me during my 15 years on the LPGA Tour, but now it is time to let it go. It will take time for the words “my condo” to exit my vocabulary.
As I move through this transition—changing my place of residency and letting go of the familiar—I find myself on a rollercoaster ride of ambivalence. I don’t want to sell; it’s time. I love my condo; it is not where I want to live. I want to keep it; it’s costing too much money. I feel blessed for the opportunity to sell to people who I know; I am sad.
The process of selling my condo has been bathed in prayer. I have laid my requests out to the Lord for over a year. And I have patiently waited (well most the time) for it to happen in the right time and in the right way. The waiting has been challenging. Learning to not just wait, but to wait expectantly has been a work in progress for my heart.
Often when we first hear the word wait, we think that it means to sit and do nothing. But the Hebrew word for wait actually implies that it is active: to look out or about, keep watch, observe. Waiting expectantly is not about trying to make something happen, but it does require our participation during the process.
If this is true, then it makes sense that the transitions we experience require us to actively wait. First and foremost, we are to cry out to the Lord for help. He wants to hear our voice and he wants to join us in our feelings and/or pain. Personally, actively waiting begins when I choose to sit quietly. It is uncomfortable, but it slows my mind down enough so that I can pay attention to my heart.
While I don’t have all the answers as to why I am selling my condo at this time, I am choosing to wait expectantly: to look out, keep watch, and observe for what God is working in my own heart and for where he is leading me next.
Transitions are happening around and in our lives every day: broken relationships, loss, moving, parent to empty-nester to grandparent, health issues, life decisions, job changes. May we actively look out, keep watch, and observe so that we can join God in the transitions.
August 31, 2017
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